We feel, and we become.
But if you are overweight, chances are, there is one part deep-deep inside of you, that wanted to be that way.
Body shock
Any drastic changes to our body can be a shock to our mind - whether it is sudden weight loss, loss of a limb, loss of hair - because our mind is conditioned to being in a certain way and the human mind doesn't generally respond well to changes. Whenever it senses change, it will try to revert back into its old pattern, patterns that feels more familiar and comforting.
Sudden changes to our bodies or environments can have drastic effects on our mental health, resulting in panic/anxiety. Extreme cases of body shock may lead to death - it is also the reason why liposuction has to be done in stages.
In response to more gradual changes, the mind will simply respond like a coiled spring and bounces itself back into its old habits - yo yo diets.
So now do you understand why people so often eat themselves back into their old weights after a liposuction, and yo yo themselves even heavier than before their diets?
You are not ready to lose weight.
Your mind and body have been so used to the current weight, that the weight loss suddenly feels uncomfortable. The mind goes into a panic, and sets off the alarm button so that you start eating and eating again.
You are not supposed to be of less weight than you are now!
So what do you do?
Accepting the new body
So, before you embark on your next diet/weight loss program, consider preparing your mind into accepting its new body.
As Rhonda Byrne mention in The Power book, Imagine it, feel it, receive it...
It's all a feeling
So you have in mind the kind of body you want. But "seeing" it in imagination still keeps you at a distance.
Can you feel it in your body? Can you imagine how your body would feel when it is different? When it is more toned, slimmer, sexier?
How would you feel, having a body like that? Do you like it? Are you comfortable with it? Are you used to it?
Imagine, what would a person in that body do in a day? What would be his/her habits? How would you move, talk and walk? How would you eat? What would you be eating instead?
If by now, you feel comfortably fit in and totally awesome in your new imagined body, then great! You may be on your path to weight loss already.
Some people are successful in their weight loss programs because they had unknowingly conditioned their mind into accepting their new body before and during the course of their weight loss. As a result, their body does not bounce back into it's old form when they have achieved weight loss.
However, if you find that the slimmer, sexier body doesn't feel quite right, that lifestyle isn't so comfortable, then there is a part of you that is not ready to lose weight.
Why don't I want to be slim?
Maybe, it's that subconscious thing.
There has to be a reason why you ended up with this weight - an emotional reason, a payoff. You might scream, "Why in the world would anyone wants to be fat?" But these reasons go beyond the common, rational desire of wanting to look and feel good. It goes wayy deeper than that - believes and emotional attachments that make up your subconscious programming, which manifest itselves into the everyday habits that drives you.
It could be a limiting believe that you have held:
- I hate slim people, they must be sickly/anorexic.
- It must be difficult and painful to be slim.
- It is socially unacceptable/wasteful of my money to order smaller portions.
- I must eat at every meal time, 6 times a day, even if I am not hungry.
- Committing to an exercise regime is laughable/limiting to my social life.
- You were loved because you are round and chubby. You will not be loved anymore once you slim down.
- I don't have time to care about my weight/health.
- You want to avoid being too attractive, because you had received unwanted attention when you were once more attractive.
- You feel very vulnerable against the world and needed the emotional "cushion" the extra body weight provides.
- You like the feeling of fullness over-eating is able to provide you, either in the sense of relaxation from the deep breath or blood rush to your belly, or to prevent the sense of vulnerability from the "emptiness." (yes, because a "normal sized" person experiences periods of empty stomach, in between meals, and it is normal to feel a hungry a few times a day, before meals)
Whatever your reason, your subconscious programming may appear quite illogical. Afterall, it is your emotion that drives it, not your logic. How often do you find yourself knowing what you should do, and not doing it? How often do you find yourself reasoning yourself into doing something and ended up not doing it? Because we are driven by emotions. We are emotional creatures and logic often means nothing to us.
Trying to reason ourselves into losing weight is pointless. Using willpower to wrestle your way through your subconscious programming will prove futile.
Self-honesty, self-acceptance
You may or may not be consciously aware of these programming that drives your habits, and your awareness of them is dependent on the level of self-honesty you practice within yourself.
You may learn to discover the reasons by first talking to yourself and asking yourself this question "Why do I really want/need to be overweight?"
You may speak it out loud, but it is easier to write them down own paper. Scribble all the possible answers on a piece of paper/notebook. Keep going when you feel like you are running out of answers. Keep going until you feel that you have reached a point of total honesty with yourself - you may get emotional, you may cry, you may feel scared, you may revive a past hurt or anger.
Whatever it is, get honest. The more honest you are with yourself, the faster you will discover the true reasons for your undoing.
The key is to be entirely open, self-accepting, loving and forgiving. No matter what answer emerged onto your piece of paper, remember to not be judgemental of yourself, not to feel anger or hold grudge towards anyone or yourself. You are only human, and you deserve to be loved no matter what you do/say/think/feel.
Sometimes, the reasons that drives us or motivates us might be a selfish one, immoral, illogical, or downright ridiculous! We didn't know that we are still holding in something from so long ago. But the truth remains that, that is our true and honest self speaking. If we are honest with ourselves, we will always know the reason of why we do what we do. And when you do, release it!
The release
In EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), people tap meridian points and repeat statements to release limiting believes and emotions.
Events in our lives which triggered strong emotions locks in thoughts and decisions made in that instant, that continue to form parts of your subconscious programming. Your decisions may change over months, years or decades, but some of these emotional baggage is so heavy, they continue to linger on long after you had changed your mind on the subject matter.
E.g. - Let's say your boyfriend dumped your for a girl who is rounder than you. At that moment, you decided that "I am going to make myself fatter to look more like her, so that he would love me again."
That would have been an emotional point in your life. Soon, you might start gaining some weight. Maybe you got him back. Maybe you didn't. But you may have moved on. You forgot about the "decision". You are happy with your life now, and wanted to lose weight again and feel like before.
But you don't want to feel like you did before. It would bring you back to the time when you felt so bad about yourself! Why would you want to go back to that?
Accept, forgive, love
Remain calm, loving and accepting of yourself while you ask yourself these questions.
If you want to release your emotional bondage, you must accept that you felt that way, accept what happened to you as the past, that you have moved on. Forgive what happened. Forgive what had been done to you. Forgive the people who had wronged you. They were only human anyway. Forgive yourself for letting that happen to you.
Love. Practice universal love. Love all, love yourself, love people no matter what they do. Love them for who they are.
Accept, forgive and love, it is the most healing thing you can do for yourself and others.
If you are able to accept, forgive and love completely, you will be able to move on. And I urge you, if you are to partake in this process, to complete it up to total release, for otherwise, it would only serve to bring up past unhappiness that you are not able to move away from.
Do not stay in an unhappy place, it is not healthy for you and it will only disempower you.
If you are prepared to keep going and then move on, then good for you. Good luck in trying it. Release your past anger, silly mistakes and brash decisions.
Let go of past baggage and move on.
As you can imagine, this process is not just for weight loss. It applies to anything you want to change in your life.
If you have been working on changing something in your life for a long time and it is not working, you feel extremely stuck, you may try releasing with love.
A new conditioning
While accessing and accepting limiting thoughts and believes releases them from your conditioning, new habits will appear and replace the old ones. If we do not consciously replace habits and feelings we want into our everyday lives, things that we don't want will automatically appear.
As Tony Robbins said, if you don't want weeds in your garden, plant the things you want. Otherwise, you would be forever pulling out weeds.
Weeding is important, but what do you really want to plant?
Start to inculcate that positive image of yourself daily. Integrate positive habits into your life. Imagine, see, feel and live the life you truly want - one that keeps you happy, vital and fulfilled.
See yourself living anew, starting your day fresh and alert. Partake in positive affirmations, visualisations and meditations. 21 days to perfect health
Feel yourself choosing healthy food choices. Go fresh, go vege, go organic, and taste the difference in the life and vibrance your food offers you!
Develop hobbies in physical activities that inspires you to move and get active. Exercise doesn't have to mean going to the gym! Whatever gets you moving, whatever makes you sweat. Play a game, walk the dog, hike up the nearby hill. Play! Enjoy your life, enjoy your body!
Connect with like-minded people, people who wants to live well, healthy, and positive.
Get your loved ones involved in your activities and goals.
Lastly, get up your heavy butt, feel mobile, feel youthful, feel light, and move like you mean it!
Important reminder: The information presented in this article or anywhere on this website are intended for educational use only and are not substitutes for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment of a medical or psychiatric illness. If you have or suspect you may have a health problem, please consult with your health care provider.
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